Why do men think that women are always flirting with them?

Sexual Overperception Bias

, explained.
Bias

What is Sexual Overperception Bias?

The sexual overperception bias relates to the tendency to overperceive another individual’s sexual interest in oneself. The bias predominantly occurs in men, where they are more likely to overestimate a woman’s sexual interest while women are more likely to underestimate a man’s.

“How many men are truly unable to distinguish between wanted and unwanted sex, between welcome and ‘gross’ behaviour, between decency and degradation?”

– Amina Srinivasan, author of The Right to Sex

Sources

  1. Lee, A. J., Sidari, M. J., Murphy, S. C., Sherlock, J. M., & Zietsch, B. P. (2020). Sex differences in misperceptions of sexual interest can be explained by sociosexual orientation and men projecting their own interest onto women. Psychological science, 31(2), 184-192.
  2. Howell, E. C., Etchells, P. J., & Penton-Voak, I. S. (2012). The sexual overperception bias is associated with sociosexuality. Personality and Individual Differences, 53(8), 1012-1016.
  3. Schmitt, D. P. (2005). Sociosexuality from Argentina to Zimbabwe: A 48-nation study of sex, culture, and strategies of human mating. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 28(2), 247.
  4. Jacques-Tiura, A. J., Abbey, A., Parkhill, M. R., & Zawacki, T. (2007). Why do some men misperceive women’s sexual intentions more frequently than others do? An application of the confluence model. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 33(11), 1467-1480.
  5. Haselton, M. G., & Buss, D. M. (2000). Error management theory: A new perspective on biases in cross-sex mind reading. Journal of personality and social psychology, 78(1), 81.
  6. Bendixen, M. (2014). Evidence of Systematic Bias in Sexual Over-and Underperception of Naturally Occurring Events: A Direct Replication of in a more Gender-Equal Culture. Evolutionary Psychology, 12(5), 147470491401200510.
  7. Feldblum, C. R., & Lipnic, V. A. (2016). Select Task Force on the Study of Harassment in the Workplace (U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission). Retrieved from https://www.eeoc.gov/select-task-force-study-harassment-workplace
  8. Abbey, A. (1982). Sex differences in attributions for friendly behavior: Do males misperceive females’ friendliness?. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 42(5), 830.
  9. Barrett, L. F. (2018, May 11). Why Body Language Isn’t Sexual Consent, According to Science. Retrieved from https://time.com/5274505/metoo-verbal-nonverbal-consent-cosby-schneiderman/
  10. Perilloux, C., Easton, J. A., & Buss, D. M. (2012). The misperception of sexual interest. Psychological Science, 23(2), 146-151.
  11. Hehman, J. A., et al. (2022). Who perceives sexual harassment? Sex differences and the impact of mate value, sex of perpetrator, and sex of target. Personality and Individual Differences, 185. 
  12. Hundt
  13. Ejjbair, E. (2021, December 1). #metoo and the Sexual Overperception Bias. Medium. https://eejjbair.medium.com/metoo-and-the-sexual-overperception-bias-f2f76da9a8ca
  14. Al-Shawaf, L. (2016). Could there be a male commitment skepticism bias and a female sexual overperception bias? Novel hypotheses based on Error Management Theory. Evolutionary Psychological Science, 2, 237-240. 
  15. Bendixen, M. (2014). Evidence of Systematic Bias in Sexual Over- and Underperception of Naturally Occurring Events: A Direct Replication of Haselton (2003) in a more Gender-Equal Culture. Evolutionary Psychology. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491401200510
  16. Muise, A., Stanton, S. C. E., Kim, J. J., & Impett, E. A. (2016). Not in the mood? Men under-(not over-) perceive their partner’s sexual desire in established intimate relationships. J Pers Soc Psychol, 110(5), 725-42. 
  17. Dolan, E. W. (2021, March 4). New psychology research suggests sexual perception is more nuanced than previously thought. PsyPost. https://www.psypost.org/new-psychology-research-suggests-sexual-perception-is-more-nuanced-than-previously-thought/#google_vignette
  18. Brandner, J. L., Pohlman, J., & Brase, G. L. (2021). On hits and being hit on: error management theory, signal detection theory, and the male sexual overperception bias. Evolution and Human Behavior, 42(4). 331-342. 
  19. Hsu, D. T. et al. (2020). Common neural responses to romantic rejection and acceptance in healthy adults. Soc Neurosci, 15(5), 571-583. 
  20. Bendixen, M. (2014). Evidence of systematic bias in sexual over- and underperception of naturally occurring events: A direct replication of  in a more gender-equal culture. Evolutionary Psychology, 12(5), 1004–1021. https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491401200510 

About the Authors

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Dan Pilat

Dan is a Co-Founder and Managing Director at The Decision Lab. He is a bestselling author of Intention - a book he wrote with Wiley on the mindful application of behavioral science in organizations. Dan has a background in organizational decision making, with a BComm in Decision & Information Systems from McGill University. He has worked on enterprise-level behavioral architecture at TD Securities and BMO Capital Markets, where he advised management on the implementation of systems processing billions of dollars per week. Driven by an appetite for the latest in technology, Dan created a course on business intelligence and lectured at McGill University, and has applied behavioral science to topics such as augmented and virtual reality.

A smiling man stands in an office, wearing a dark blazer and black shirt, with plants and glass-walled rooms in the background.

Dr. Sekoul Krastev

Sekoul is a Co-Founder and Managing Director at The Decision Lab. He is a bestselling author of Intention - a book he wrote with Wiley on the mindful application of behavioral science in organizations. A decision scientist with a PhD in Decision Neuroscience from McGill University, Sekoul's work has been featured in peer-reviewed journals and has been presented at conferences around the world. Sekoul previously advised management on innovation and engagement strategy at The Boston Consulting Group as well as on online media strategy at Google. He has a deep interest in the applications of behavioral science to new technology and has published on these topics in places such as the Huffington Post and Strategy & Business.

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